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The Wicker Man
Flesh to touch... flesh to burn! Don't keep the Wicker Man waiting!
Reviewed by BQueen

Sgt. Howie (Edward Woodward) of the Scottish police, a deeply religious man is lured to a remote island by an anonymous letter telling the tale of a missing girl. He is surprised to find out that no one will admit to ever knowing the girl, Rowan Morrison, even her own mother. After finally finding mention of the missing girl the schoolteacher reluctantly admits there once was a girl named Rowan Morrison, but she is not dead, just transmuted.
Sgt. Howie finally makes a visit to the man in charge, Lord Summerisle (Christopher Lee). On the way he is treated to a number of naked girls dancing and jumping over a bonfire. At the home of Lord Summerisle he gets the history of the island. Summerisles grandfather founded the island and made a deal with a bunch of old gods who would ensure them good crops in return for being worshipped.

Sgt. Howie then begins to find clues that maybe Rowan Morrison is alive, but probably won’t be for long unless he can find her and put a stop to these psycho pagan sex fiends. That Lord Summerisle wants him gone by May Day leads Sgt. Howie to study up on the rites of May Day, leading him to some disturbing truths about Rowans fate. It’s just too bad he can’t unbend his solid Christian belief system enough to figure out the true nature of the islanders plans.

This is definitely not a traditional horror movie. If you want your horror served up with body parts and a side of blood you’re not going to find it here. There aren’t any big scare moments, just a sense of mounting dread.

Ok I guess I need to mention the songs. There is A LOT of singing going on in this movie. Truly they could write this sucker for Broadway in about an hour. Yes the songs are a little cheesy, ok make that really, really cheesy, but they are strangely catchy too. The best one takes place with Britt Ekland’s character doing the seduction dance (naked!) trying to get poor Sgt. Howie to compromise his virtue. Let me tell you the sexual tension comes right out of your TV and you will probably spend the rest of the day trying to get someone to have sex with you.

Watch this movie with an open mind and take care as to who you watch it with. You’re not going to get the nuances of this flick sitting around with a bunch of rowdies who don’t get subtle horror.

9 out of 10 nubile young pagans


The Wicker Man
Flesh to touch... flesh to burn! Don't keep the Wicker Man waiting!
Reviewed by WL Paynecraft
This is a great movie. It's a little dated, but that's all right.

I thought the singing was a little unnecessary, plus the songs in general were terrible. The seduction dance was quite satisfactory, albeit a bit strange.

I'm more of a "crazy naked dancing pagan islander" at heart, but I really felt bad for the detective's naivete and his general humble nature being preyed upon. Even though he was short tempered and fairly narrow minded, he won me over by the time the movie ended.

The acting was great. I didn't even know that was Christopher Lee playing the crazy leader of the islanders until the movie was damn near over. I will take a penalty drink for not recognizing his awesome presence and commanding voice, even in drag.

At some points (especially the end), the craziness of the islanders got sinister. Throughout the movie, you were kind of siding with them. They had fun, didn't care about stuff, drank booze and fornicated. They had these really funny looking dances and sang. There was nothing funny about the ending though. It was very dark and grim, as well as classic.

I am not a fan of sequels or of remakes, but I feel that this movie could probably benefit from both. I would love to see a part 2, just to see if it takes a supernatural or a strictly scientific path. Plus, the movie in general might benefit from a touchup or two. The songs could be remade and shortened. I say don't do remakes, but if you are going to, then remake this one.

Overall, this was an entertaining movie. I thought it had a strong and interesting storyline. The beginning starts a little slow and the singing isn't for everyone. I give this 8.5 out of 10 Iron Maiden songs that can roll behind the ending credits of the remake.

The Wicker Man
Flesh to touch... flesh to burn! Don't keep the Wicker Man waiting!
Reviewed by Vamp Vixen
All I can say is WOW! I had to see this movie according to the reviews above and I'm glad I did. One of the first things I noticed was the "Kubrick-esque" feel from the cinematography and how the director helped me try to define the characters through their odd culture and way of life.

I loved the way the story unravelled and the constant suspense was exhilarating. The music and singing didn't bother me too much since I felt that this was a way to get you involved with the people on the island. To reveal exactly what the island people were all about. Myself being a christian, I was very moved at how the policeman maintained his spirit and devotion to God even at during his last moments on the island.

What I think was missing was the lack of intelligence from the policeman when he didn't leave the island sooner. I believe that he knew from the very first day that something was awry and he should have acted on is instincts. His devotion to finding the missing girl was in the right place, but he needed some serious backup!

All in all, I absolutely felt that this is a gem that should never be forgotten. Psychological mind screwing and twisted endings...something that I think is seriously lacking from Hollywood these days. One movie I will remember for a long time.

I give it a 9.5 out of 10 naked people randomly having sex next to a graveyard.

(1973) Robin Hardy, Anthony Shaffer

Edward Woodward .... Sergeant Neil Howie
Christopher Lee .... Lord Summerisle
Diane Cilento .... Miss Rose
Britt Ekland .... Willow
Ingrid Pitt .... Librarian
Lindsay Kemp .... Alder MacGregor
Russell Waters .... Harbor Master
Aubrey Morris .... Old Gardener/Gravedigger
Irene Sunters .... May Morrison
Walter Carr .... School Master
Ian Campbell .... Oak
Leslie Blackater .... Hairdresser
Roy Boyd .... Broome
Peter Brewis .... Musician
Barbara Rafferty .... Woman with Baby

Also known as:
Anthony Shaffer's The Wicker Man
The Wickerman



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