The Covenant is from the action movie director Renny Harlin. It’s about a group of young men who have special powers. They have inherited these powers throughout the generations. This is traced back to around the Salem witch trial era. Sorry ladies, no girls allowed. That concept was more or less already done in The Craft anyway. These men are handsome, filthy rich, and have chiseled abs. They are descended from five original families, though one of the bloodlines was supposedly severed. Anyway, they all go to a private school for only the richest of spoiled brats. Strange things start going down and the guys can’t decide if it’s happening from within their ranks, or if there is an external presence roaming about.

I am mixed about this movie. I hated many things about it, but I ended up enjoying myself nonetheless. The plot is unoriginal (The Talisman, The Craft and Witchouse all had similar themes). The one-liners were devastatingly bad (“Harry Potter can kiss my ass!”, or “I‘m gonna make you my wi-otch!”). It’s hard to pull for arrogant spoiled models who drive around in Hummers and bully poor people.

As predicted, the nudity was sparse and relegated mostly to locker room male ass. The final fight scene was very predictable and too long.

The CGI was good and the movie looked like it had a decent budget. Harlin created some pretty good action scenes as well. The cast was completely anonymous, but it worked out pretty good. It was pretty refreshing not seeing any of the usual suspects. Kind of like when you watch a movie that has a kid in it that isn’t Dakota Fanning. The movie was clearly geared towards high schoolers, but I managed to pull some entertainment value out of it, despite graduating high school nearly a hundred years ago.

I would never have watched this movie by choice, but there was nothing else on and “the better half” thought it might be good. It wasn’t bad. I remember groaning at first sight of the trailer when it originally came out. It’s worth a look-see if you don’t have much else going on. Beware the one-liners! I give this 5.75 out of 10 wi-otches. Uggh.

This review was fueled by Into Eternity. Good stuff.